He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
