Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize