Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
This Twitter User’s Story About Meeting A Notorious Serial Killer Will Leave You Shook
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
20+ Wholesome Memes You Need In Your Life Right Now
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.