You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
