i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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