I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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