New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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