You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pee on everything he values.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
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