I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Randomize