Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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