nut hugger
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
