What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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