Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
