I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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