"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
