I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
