erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
