Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
