"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.