I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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