Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
