Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
