benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
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