I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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