I saw his package. It spoke to me.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
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