Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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