I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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