so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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