I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
