He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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