two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
