Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
