the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
