FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
