if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
