please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
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When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
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Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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