i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize