Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
my shit smells like andre
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
The air taste purple.
Randomize
