Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
