She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
