I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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