whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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