Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
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Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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