I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize