If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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