Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
