those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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