I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
