guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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