You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize