I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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